Character and Setting

Words of wisdom from the most unexpected source imaginable: sometimes this is what gets you through the day. Today, for instance, began all right. Then it was bad. Then it was okay again. Then it was amazing.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

My latest project for the kids in the evening program is a podcast to the editor. We're going around asking each other questions like, "What changes would you most like to make?" "What about the world frustrates you?" "What is going well?" "Do you think it's possible to change other people?"

Now, there is one boy in the evening program who is a mess: always a little ragged, always a little hungry, sometimes a little dirty, always foul-mouthed and peripatetic. He wandered into our interview session today and instead of allowing him to interrupt us (although he is unexpectedly respectful of the voice recorder; he always asks if it's recording before launching into offensive lyrics, and if it is he paces and waits) we decided to interview him.

In response to the question "Do you think it's possible to change other people?" he answered in the affirmative. "How is it possible?" asked his interviewer.

He thought for a long time. Just before the interviewer got frustrated and moved on to something else, he muttered, "The setting."

"What?" he interviewer demanded.

"The setting. You gotta change the setting."

"Setting means place and time," explained the interviewer a touch condescendingly. "You mean place and time?"

"Yeah, man, but, you know..." he trailed off and eyed the floor.

"You mean more than that?" I began. "You mean--?"

"I mean like everything. Their attitude. Their atmosphere. One thing at least. You gotta change the setting."

When the interview was done, he bounced away, grabbing a pool stick as he headed out the door, gone before I could say anything about it. Later I saw him doing pull-ups on the triangular bar holding the library door open. Even later, I stood in the art room and he hopped past the window in the alley outside, grinning widely, waving with one hand, giving the finger with the other, on his way home.

He rarely listens, he is frequently disrespectful, many staff members worry about him although few like him. I really hope he can find it within himself to change his setting one day. Or that, if he is unable, he finds someone who can.